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What is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy?
ACT or Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is a scientifically based therapy that has proven highly effective with a huge range of painful human conditions, such as depression, addiction, stress, and many other psychological issues.
More recently, the key principles of ACT have been used in the realm of Couples Counselling with great success. ACT is now one of the most highly regarded and well-rounded therapies for Couples.
ACT is based on a set of powerful principles that enable you to develop psychological flexibility. Psychological Flexibility is the ability to be present, open up and do what matters.
A - Accept your thoughts and feelings and be present with them.
C - Choose a Valued Direction.
T - Take Action.
The aim or essence of ACT is to create a rich, full and meaningful life while accepting that we must sometimes and inevitably also accept emotional pain.
The goal of ACT is to increase psychological flexibility. Psychological Flexibility has two key components:
1. The Ability to be psychologically present, this means being aware, attentive, open and engaged in whatever experience may be occurring in the now.
2. The ability to control your behaviour and honour your values in a conscious and deliberate manner.
ACT is primarily a mindfulness based therapy that helps couples accept and validate all of their emotional experiences by removing shame and avoidance.
This process is guided by the idea that there is validity not only in the emotional experience we have, but also in the one that our partner has as well.
Often, when we have an emotional reaction that leaves us feeling stuck, it's because it's rooted in something that's happened in our past.
With ACT, partners learn how to acknowledge their past with compassion and let go of unhelpful thoughts that keep them from being in the current moment together.
Partners learn to identify their inner voice - the one that judges themselves and their partners - and create space in their awareness to be able to move through difficult moments together.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)for relationships, often referred to as "ACT with Love", takes a refreshingly different approach. While most therapies try to "fix" the partner or "solve" the problem, ACT focuses on psychological flexibility.
The core idea is simple: You cannot control your partner, and you cannot always control your feelings, but you can control your actions.
ACT helps you stop struggling against the "unfixable" parts of your relationship so you can focus on being the partner you want to be.
